When I finally came out to myself it was such a battle for me to find an identity. I wasn't interested in the glamour and glitter of the super fag lifestyle. I also wasn't interested in being a slut, I was looking for relationships with men. I was interested in punk rock and skating. Other queers would accuse me of homophobia for not being interested in the mainstream homo-lifestyle. I didn't dislike them, I just didn't want to participate.

I needed a hero, a role model, some iconic alternative fag to look up to. Now years later, I have plenty of queers in my life that I can look to for guidance and advice. Many are online friends I know only through e-mail. All of them genuine people who define themselves as more than just queer.

All the usual young adult issues like healing after a breakup and wanting so badly to make out with someone who shares your same interests are compounded by having to deal with friendships smashed by coming out and the threat of HIV. The articles in this issue of HOMO are about discovering identity and finding your place in the queer community.