HOMO No.7
HOMO No.7
Queer Life
HOMOzine

Why I'll Never Be A Proper Homosexual


Part 2



1.I guess I will never be a proper homosexual because I don't have the perfect body.

2. I'll never be a proper homosexual because I don't think that Madonna is anything but an empire and because I think she should basically retire.

3. I'll never be a proper homosexual because I detest wearing clothing with "Ambercrombie & Fitch" emblazoned across my chest.

4. I'll never be a proper homosexual because I cannot stand going to only gay bars, preferring to go where there is a general mix of people of all lifestyles and types. Didn't we fight to be seen and not segregated?

5. I'll never be a proper homosexual because I really detest "diva house" music and the words: metrosexual, breeder, fencesitter, and confused.

6. I'll never be a proper homosexual because I refuse to read acceptable publications like OUT Magazine and the Advocate.

7. I'll never be a proper homosexual because unlike a great percentage of my peers, I have actually studied in depth about what has happened in our history for the past several hundred years. I'd like to know that despite everything my fellow Queers bitch about, I want to know what my "ancestors" went through in order for me to be who I am.

8. I'll never be a proper homosexual because I have been "gifted" with a virus that has filled me with knowledge, and that I have to constantly educate the dumbass faggots by saying things like "Oh no! You can't get it from a toilet seat or from kissing!"

9. I'll never be a proper homosexual because I don't know what's happening on Top 40 radio.

10. I'll never be a proper homosexual because of how I view my sexuality "Queer is what I am, not who I am, and my life doesn't revolve around sexual preference."

[and my favorite one -ed]

11. I'll never be a proper homosexual because I basically don't give a shit about this "community" and the term "pride"

Answer me this: What the fuck does Stolinachya Vodka, WET Lube and all the other corporate bullshit at "Pride" have to do with what REALLY happened at Stonewall?

--Christopher G.